Arranging Extended Time with a Bar Girl: What to Expect

[aiden15632]

Hi everyone,
I’m planning to spend a few days with a bar girl (BG) and would appreciate any advice on what to expect regarding costs and arrangements. I’m looking to spend around 3 days with her, not just a traditional "long time" (LT) that covers a single night’s stay and breakfast.
Here’s the background: I met her a couple of months ago in Kan. Her rate was 300 baht for the bar fine (BF) and 2,000 baht for LT, with her leaving after breakfast. This arrangement worked well for one night, but I’d like to extend our time together on my next visit. The girl provides a great girlfriend experience (GFE) despite her limited English, and we communicate via LINE, though she only responds if I initiate contact.
For a 2-3 day arrangement, what would be a reasonable expectation in terms of pricing? Should I anticipate paying for 3 nights’ worth of BF in addition to a daily rate, or is there a different structure for extended stays? Also, all other expenses will be covered by me, as usual.
Any insights or experiences with similar situations would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance!

[daniel74]

Start by offering a boyfriend experience (BF) plus 1,500 per day, with food, drinks, and tourist activities included. See how she responds to this proposal. It’s better to begin with a reasonable offer rather than starting too high, as she might counter with a higher rate. Giving yourself some flexibility in negotiations can help you find a middle ground that works for both of you.

[hilululu]

I don't think you should get too far ahead of yourself when going for these extend-LT things with girls. You need to find a girl whom which you (and her) have a nice comfort level with... Take her LT for one night and if all goes well, then the next morning ask her if she wants to stay the couple next days/night. If you negotiate 3 days in advance, you might end up being disappointed and having to send a girl off early or she might bail, making one of you feel kind of shitty about the situation.



Diving in head first for LLT is like trying to put the square peg in the round hole. Most guys who rave about the great extended-LT they had with a girl, met the girl, spent a little bit of time with her, and then they both wanted to spend more time together. There's usually a little bit of spark there or at least a girl who's experienced you already and eager to spend more time with you. If you just go up to a girl and ask for 3 days, it's forcing it a bit too much.



With that said it'll depend on where she works and what her contract is at her bar. I guess you could expect to pay at lest a LT fee for each day and probably the barfine for each day. But that is really a very vague guess. Every girl is different. Some might want you to pay more since you're spending literally all day together, and some might want you to pay less since they don't want to work or go with other guys.

[hilululu]

Diabolic nailed it. Unless you have a good relationship with the girl already it could get dicey. Have you been to her room? Does she live alone or with someone? IE: mom, kid/s, roommate or boyfriend/husband. I took one very LLT as in 2 weeks last trip I thought I knew quite well. Knew she lived alone as I had been to her room a number of times and we had got on famously in the past. Still there are things I enjoyed she did not and these girls can get moody if you want to do something they do not enjoy. While in Chiang Mai I enjoy a just walking around, including a night walk around the moat at 6.5 kilometers, she obliged but after a couple of Kilometers she, visibly by posture, had had enough. So I would advise you think about this carefully before committing this much time out of your visit, especially someone that never initiates contact with you. Diabolic called me out last TR and in hindsight rightfully so. We really can not know these girls in the brief time we spend with them. It is only when you get down to a somewhat normal routine and start also ensuring you have activities you enjoy that we can see where their hearts truly are. Good luck.

[johnson13]

Great insight Diabolic and Viandefraich - much appreciated! Certainly some issues raised there.



Previously I spent two consecutive evenings with her in her bar. Plenty of banter, games and laughter despite the language barrier. As I said before, both times ended up LT. On the first night we stopped by at her place because she wanted to change her shoes ???? ????, she told me lives with a friend who works at the bar...it was all within walking distance anyway - small town!

Sure, after only two times I can't say I know her at all, but felt enough spark to think spending more time (particularly during the day) would be fun. We've kept in touch since via LINE, almost every other day, her own timeline posts very rarely get other guys posting on there, and she doesn't have FB or wechat (so she tells me). although it's usually me who starts the conversation, she is constantly positive and vibey, even despite the recent passing of HM. Bar closure has meant no job for her - she says for 30 days, despite the bar being open after the initial 3 days (my guess is that the bar is open for a low key month with no BG's allowed?)



This, she says, means she cannot stay in Thailand (she is from Lao), and would have to temporarily return to Lao for a month. A few days since, she say she she doesn't need to return after all. Anyway, she hasn't asked for money at any point. She seems very keen to spend time with me on my next return.

[shant234]

So am I understanding correctly that you want to spend 3 days with the girl you went LT with before and have been chatting with online? It wasn't really clear in your OP if you wanted to take a totally new girl or that girl?



If it's the same girl, then it seems like it wouldn't be a big deal. Since you're chatting with her on LINE, tell her the dates you'll be in town and ask her if she is available. Encourage her to lead the situation a bit... If she just tells you to come to the bar, barfine her LT and the same night you barfine her invite her to go do something the next day. If she isn't interested, she probably doesn't want to spend too much time with you, or if she says "I have to work" then you offer to pay her barfine again.



You said you met her in Kan? What is that? Is that the name of a bar in Bangkok or the name of place in Thailand? 300 baht barfine and 2k LT is a really good deal.