01-24-2025, 11:32 AM
I’ve had a few experiences similar to yours, and I totally get the frustration. The fact that you can finish by yourself but not with her is telling, though. It’s a psychological barrier, for sure. When I went through this, I realized that I’d conditioned myself to a certain kind of stimulation during solo play that wasn’t always replicable with a partner. That disconnect between the two types of stimulation can cause a lot of confusion and stress.
What worked for me was taking the pressure off and approaching intimacy in a more relaxed way. I started setting the intention that sex was about connection and pleasure, not about reaching the finish line. It took some mental rewiring, but over time, it allowed me to be more present and less concerned with the end goal. Letting go of the "I must finish" mindset helped me find enjoyment in the whole process.
You’re right to consider communication with your partner. I had a similar conversation where I admitted that I was feeling pressure, and we took a break from the usual routine to focus on emotional connection. Just letting her know that you’re working through something might help relieve the tension. Most partners want to see you happy, and the reassurance can make a big difference.
Lastly, resetting the rhythm of your encounters can sometimes help. You might need to experiment with new sensations, techniques, or even different settings to break free from the mental block. It’s a process, and it’s okay to take your time.
What worked for me was taking the pressure off and approaching intimacy in a more relaxed way. I started setting the intention that sex was about connection and pleasure, not about reaching the finish line. It took some mental rewiring, but over time, it allowed me to be more present and less concerned with the end goal. Letting go of the "I must finish" mindset helped me find enjoyment in the whole process.
You’re right to consider communication with your partner. I had a similar conversation where I admitted that I was feeling pressure, and we took a break from the usual routine to focus on emotional connection. Just letting her know that you’re working through something might help relieve the tension. Most partners want to see you happy, and the reassurance can make a big difference.
Lastly, resetting the rhythm of your encounters can sometimes help. You might need to experiment with new sensations, techniques, or even different settings to break free from the mental block. It’s a process, and it’s okay to take your time.