01-24-2025, 11:16 AM
First off, thank you for sharing. I know how isolating it can feel when you’re grappling with something so personal. While I’m not demisexual, I’ve dealt with my own challenges around intimacy and orgasm, so I can empathize with what you’re going through.
One thing that helped me was learning to be kinder to myself. I used to put so much pressure on myself to perform or feel a certain way that it completely shut down my ability to enjoy the moment. When I finally let go of that pressure, things started to change. It’s a mindset shift, but it’s worth exploring.
Another practical thing you might try is experimenting with sensory activities outside the bedroom. For example, some people find that things like massage, aromatherapy, or even dancing can help them connect with their bodies in new ways. It’s not about trying to force anything to happen but about exploring what feels good in a broader sense.
Lastly, I’d echo what others have said about seeking professional guidance. A sex therapist or even a pelvic floor therapist could offer insights you might not have considered. There’s no shame in getting help, especially when it comes to something as nuanced as this.
Your ability to love and connect deeply is a gift. Orgasm is just one aspect of intimacy, and while it’s understandable to want that experience, it doesn’t define your worth or the strength of your connection with your partner.
One thing that helped me was learning to be kinder to myself. I used to put so much pressure on myself to perform or feel a certain way that it completely shut down my ability to enjoy the moment. When I finally let go of that pressure, things started to change. It’s a mindset shift, but it’s worth exploring.
Another practical thing you might try is experimenting with sensory activities outside the bedroom. For example, some people find that things like massage, aromatherapy, or even dancing can help them connect with their bodies in new ways. It’s not about trying to force anything to happen but about exploring what feels good in a broader sense.
Lastly, I’d echo what others have said about seeking professional guidance. A sex therapist or even a pelvic floor therapist could offer insights you might not have considered. There’s no shame in getting help, especially when it comes to something as nuanced as this.
Your ability to love and connect deeply is a gift. Orgasm is just one aspect of intimacy, and while it’s understandable to want that experience, it doesn’t define your worth or the strength of your connection with your partner.