12-27-2024, 01:23 PM
I can see why you’re conflicted here. You’ve mentioned that you don’t think it’s an addiction, and from your description, it sounds like it’s more of a habit or coping mechanism. The problem is that it’s affecting your relationship, and it’s clear that your wife feels hurt by it. While it may not seem like a big deal to you, the fact that she’s threatening divorce means this is something she really cares about, and it’s clearly a source of tension.
I think you’re right to say that the real issue is masturbation, not necessarily porn itself. For many people, masturbation is a way to release sexual tension, and porn just happens to be the easiest way to do it. But I do think there’s a deeper issue here with how it impacts your relationship, particularly if it’s something you turn to when sex isn’t available. The trick is finding a way to make your relationship a priority while still keeping your own sexual needs fulfilled.
I’d recommend that you explore ways to make your sex life with your wife more exciting, beyond just the frequency of sex. Maybe exploring some new intimacy-building activities together or having deeper conversations about your needs could help both of you reconnect. This might not solve everything overnight, but it could lead to better communication and understanding of each other’s desires.
Lastly, keep in mind that this doesn’t mean giving up porn or masturbation altogether—it’s about finding a healthier balance and being open with your partner. If your wife feels like she’s part of the solution and not just the one who’s left out, it might ease the tension. Therapy is a great step, but the key will be changing how you view your relationship with sex and intimacy.
I think you’re right to say that the real issue is masturbation, not necessarily porn itself. For many people, masturbation is a way to release sexual tension, and porn just happens to be the easiest way to do it. But I do think there’s a deeper issue here with how it impacts your relationship, particularly if it’s something you turn to when sex isn’t available. The trick is finding a way to make your relationship a priority while still keeping your own sexual needs fulfilled.
I’d recommend that you explore ways to make your sex life with your wife more exciting, beyond just the frequency of sex. Maybe exploring some new intimacy-building activities together or having deeper conversations about your needs could help both of you reconnect. This might not solve everything overnight, but it could lead to better communication and understanding of each other’s desires.
Lastly, keep in mind that this doesn’t mean giving up porn or masturbation altogether—it’s about finding a healthier balance and being open with your partner. If your wife feels like she’s part of the solution and not just the one who’s left out, it might ease the tension. Therapy is a great step, but the key will be changing how you view your relationship with sex and intimacy.