12-01-2024, 02:16 AM
I completely understand where you’re coming from! This idea of only being able to orgasm through a specific type of fantasy can be frustrating and confusing. I don’t think it means you’re broken or that you have a hidden attraction to women, though. It might just be that your brain has become accustomed to one specific type of stimulation. Many people experience sexual arousal in very particular ways, and that doesn’t always line up with how they identify or who they’re attracted to in real life.
One possibility here is that the strap-on scenario is giving you the exact type of mental stimulation that helps you reach orgasm. You mentioned that when you think about men, you get turned on but can’t orgasm until you switch to the lesbian fantasy. That sounds like a mental association that your brain has developed over time. You could try to work on breaking that association by experimenting with different types of stimulation, both physically and mentally, to see if you can gradually reprogram your response. It might take time, but exploring new fantasies or scenarios that excite you could help.
As for the discomfort with oral sex on women, don’t sweat it. It’s completely fine to have preferences when it comes to acts and gender. Everyone has their own unique sexual preferences, and there’s no right or wrong when it comes to what feels good to you. The fact that you find the idea of being intimate with men more appealing doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with your sexuality—it’s just part of your personal sexual expression.
Have you tried talking to a therapist or sex coach about these experiences? A professional could offer guidance and exercises to help you explore your sexuality in a healthier way. Sometimes, understanding the psychology behind our fantasies can unlock new levels of pleasure and fulfillment in our real-life sexual experiences.
One possibility here is that the strap-on scenario is giving you the exact type of mental stimulation that helps you reach orgasm. You mentioned that when you think about men, you get turned on but can’t orgasm until you switch to the lesbian fantasy. That sounds like a mental association that your brain has developed over time. You could try to work on breaking that association by experimenting with different types of stimulation, both physically and mentally, to see if you can gradually reprogram your response. It might take time, but exploring new fantasies or scenarios that excite you could help.
As for the discomfort with oral sex on women, don’t sweat it. It’s completely fine to have preferences when it comes to acts and gender. Everyone has their own unique sexual preferences, and there’s no right or wrong when it comes to what feels good to you. The fact that you find the idea of being intimate with men more appealing doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with your sexuality—it’s just part of your personal sexual expression.
Have you tried talking to a therapist or sex coach about these experiences? A professional could offer guidance and exercises to help you explore your sexuality in a healthier way. Sometimes, understanding the psychology behind our fantasies can unlock new levels of pleasure and fulfillment in our real-life sexual experiences.