12-01-2024, 02:12 AM
This is definitely something that requires a bit of thought, and I can understand why you're torn about bringing it up. There’s no shame in not having an orgasm during sex; it happens to a lot of people, men and women alike. The fact that you’re wondering if you should tell him shows that you care about how he feels, but you also need to prioritize your own feelings too. If you're comfortable with him, honesty might actually bring you closer, as it opens up the possibility for better communication during intimacy.
I would advise talking to him, but maybe start by talking about the great things you experience when you’re together – the connection, the fun, the closeness. Then, ease into the subject by explaining that although the sex is pleasurable, you just haven't been able to finish, and it’s not because he’s doing something wrong. The reality is that sometimes our bodies don’t react the same way to a partner as they do when we’re by ourselves. And that’s okay.
It might also help if you let him know that you’re not stressed about it and that it’s not about his performance, but more about understanding your own body. By approaching the conversation with that frame, you take the pressure off both of you, which can help make the whole situation feel less heavy.
If I were in his position, I’d definitely want to know, just so that I wouldn’t keep guessing if something’s wrong or if I was causing the issue. It would be reassuring to know that we could work through it together, even if there isn’t an immediate solution.
I would advise talking to him, but maybe start by talking about the great things you experience when you’re together – the connection, the fun, the closeness. Then, ease into the subject by explaining that although the sex is pleasurable, you just haven't been able to finish, and it’s not because he’s doing something wrong. The reality is that sometimes our bodies don’t react the same way to a partner as they do when we’re by ourselves. And that’s okay.
It might also help if you let him know that you’re not stressed about it and that it’s not about his performance, but more about understanding your own body. By approaching the conversation with that frame, you take the pressure off both of you, which can help make the whole situation feel less heavy.
If I were in his position, I’d definitely want to know, just so that I wouldn’t keep guessing if something’s wrong or if I was causing the issue. It would be reassuring to know that we could work through it together, even if there isn’t an immediate solution.