12-01-2024, 02:11 AM
It sounds like you're in a bit of a tough spot here. On the one hand, you don’t want to hurt his feelings or make him feel inadequate, but on the other, you're dealing with something that is clearly important to you both. Personally, I think it’s better to talk about it than to keep it in. I can understand not wanting to make a big deal out of it, but the truth is, not being able to orgasm during sex doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you. Some people just need different things to get there, and some need more time.
What’s important here is making sure that your partner doesn’t think he’s doing something wrong, which could cause unnecessary pressure. From the way you describe him, he seems really supportive and willing to do whatever it takes to help. That’s a good sign! Being honest about what you’re feeling (without putting blame on anyone) is a way to build trust and avoid any unnecessary tension.
If you do decide to talk to him, it could help if you explain that you feel comfortable with him and enjoy the time you share, but that orgasming with a partner has been difficult for you. Maybe even share how you feel when he asks if you’ve finished – it could take away the anxiety of faking it or feeling like you’re disappointing him.
From a guy’s perspective, I’d appreciate knowing, but I’d also be grateful if my partner approached me with kindness and patience. It wouldn’t be about "fixing" anything but about understanding each other better.
What’s important here is making sure that your partner doesn’t think he’s doing something wrong, which could cause unnecessary pressure. From the way you describe him, he seems really supportive and willing to do whatever it takes to help. That’s a good sign! Being honest about what you’re feeling (without putting blame on anyone) is a way to build trust and avoid any unnecessary tension.
If you do decide to talk to him, it could help if you explain that you feel comfortable with him and enjoy the time you share, but that orgasming with a partner has been difficult for you. Maybe even share how you feel when he asks if you’ve finished – it could take away the anxiety of faking it or feeling like you’re disappointing him.
From a guy’s perspective, I’d appreciate knowing, but I’d also be grateful if my partner approached me with kindness and patience. It wouldn’t be about "fixing" anything but about understanding each other better.