Dealing with a Thai Ex-Girlfriend at the Airport: What to Expect and How to Handle It

[aiden15632]

You recently broke up with a Thai girl you met back in May. After spending a week together and returning to Bangkok in July, you've decided to end the relationship due to the challenges of maintaining a long-distance connection. You’re now concerned that she might show up at the airport when you return next week, despite knowing the relationship is over and having cut off all communication.
Here’s what you can do to address your concerns and handle the situation effectively:
Assessing the Situation

1. Understanding Emotional Reactions:
   • Possibility of Contact: While it’s possible she might want to see you one last time, especially if the breakup was emotional or sudden, it’s not guaranteed. Her reaction depends on how she processes the breakup and her feelings towards you.
     
2. Previous Behavior:
   • Past Patterns: Reflect on her previous behavior. Has she shown any signs of being overly persistent or emotional when things didn't go as planned? This could give you an indication of her potential reaction.
     

Steps to Minimize Potential Issues

1. Prepare for the Possibility:
   • Be Calm and Polite: If she does show up at the airport, remain calm and polite. Clear communication is key. Let her know respectfully that the relationship is over and that you wish to part ways amicably.
     
2. Inform Airport Security:
   • Alert Authorities: If you’re concerned about potential disruptions, consider informing airport security or the airline staff about your situation. They can help ensure that your arrival is smooth and address any unexpected issues.
     
3. Consider Changing Plans:
   • Alternative Arrangements: If you’re very concerned about an encounter, you might consider adjusting your arrival time or airport location. Arriving at a different time or using a different terminal could reduce the chances of an unexpected meeting.
     

Emotional Preparation

1. Reflect on the Breakup:
   • Self-Care: Recognize that ending a relationship can be challenging for both parties. Make sure you’re emotionally prepared and have support systems in place, such as friends or family, to help you cope with any lingering feelings.
     
2. Focus on Your Goals:
   • Positive Mindset: Use this trip as an opportunity to have fun and enjoy yourself. Focus on the positive aspects of your trip and what you want to achieve, whether it’s sightseeing, relaxing, or socializing.
     

Communication Tips

1. Avoid Reopening Communication:
   • Stick to Your Decision: Since you’ve already cut off communication, avoid reopening discussions or making new arrangements. Clear and consistent behavior will help reinforce your decision and reduce confusion.
     
2. Be Direct if Needed:
   • Clarify Boundaries: If she does approach you, be direct yet respectful. Reiterate that the relationship is over and that you need to move on. It’s important to set clear boundaries while maintaining kindness.
     

Conclusion
While it’s understandable to be concerned about a potential encounter with your ex-girlfriend at the airport, preparation and clear communication are key. Assess the likelihood of her showing up based on her past behavior and your current situation. If you’re worried, consider informing airport security or adjusting your plans to minimize the chance of an unexpected meeting. Focus on enjoying your trip and taking care of yourself emotionally.
Forum members, have you faced a similar situation or have advice on handling breakups in such scenarios? Your insights and tips would be valuable.

[shant234]

Bangkok is a vast and vibrant city with plenty to explore, but if you're looking for a change of pace, you might consider heading to Pattaya. It's a lively destination with its own unique attractions and a different atmosphere. Whether you want to experience the bustling nightlife or relax by the beach, Pattaya offers a diverse range of activities and experiences.

[daniel74]

It’s generally best to be honest in relationships to avoid complications later. Misleading someone might lead to more problems down the line, and it can damage trust. If you're having doubts or facing issues, it’s usually better to address them openly and find a solution together.

[hilululu]

It's a real issue of genuine concern, and (while I sympathize with your predicament) I'm pleased that you brought this up.



​Need more info. Is she a working girl? (Presuming that she is, seeing as you've posted this on here.) Street freelancer, or works out of/in a beer bar/go-go? That matters.



Case by case, but how clingy/savvy she is (specifically, whether or not she’ll be aware of your presence in Bangkok even if you’ve not told her you’re coming) will depend on her work situation, years in the saddle, how regular/close/honest your contact with her (phone/email/social media) is while you're outside Thailand, and her ‘network’ of P4P gal-pals, or lack of such. You'd be surprised just how much 'knowledge' they have and how much more they appear to be able to obtain behind your back. (I was, and still am: see below.)



If you're trying to avoid a bird in Bangkok, bottom line is, be pessimistic: better safe than sorry. If she works, for example, out of Nana/Soi 4, restrict your mongering to other areas — Cowboy (though that's too close for comfort) or Patpong — and stay in a hotel well away from Lower Sukhumvit etc. Or, as Koko has suggested above, just go to Pattaya: you could probably relax there — though, if she’s a seasoned campaigner, don’t be surprised if the bar-girl jungle drumsalert her to your presence all the way to the capital. It has been known to happen. Needless to say, they're all connected on social media sites, just like we are: there'll be 'Farang Addicts' sites for bargirls galore... I'm sure my fucking photo's on a few (probably with 'Beware Of This Cheating Dickhead' as the Topic Title).

[johnson13]

We've all been amazed at the way you can stumble into a BKK bar you've only ever had one beer in six years ago to be greeted by a hale and hearty chorus of birds calling your name and telling you where you come from, what you drink, what team you support etc. More than once, I've pulled up a stool in a bar I can't even remember having been in, to have this or that serving girl chirrup: 'Harrooo, Tom Tiiiiit! How you todaaaay? Last time you mao, dlink too muts! You call Pom/Pim/Lek/Om yet? She like you mak mak, wait for you, I call her now, she cum sooon...' :o Yup, it's that scary. They know. And now, with social media, obviously they know easier and quicker and more. I’ve been in your situation and rumbled at least half a dozen times (that I can briskly recall). Christ knows how many times I might have been rumbled and never known about it. I've had phone calls from a Nana Plaza bird even before I've left the airport Arrivals Hall (how the fuck did she know what flight I'm on: do they check the passenger lists?), birds turning up at my hotel and banging on the bedroom door (the fists of fury!) while I'm busy 'entertaining' a new one within, taps on the shoulder in bars as I'm settling down to my first beer after check in...

Of course, I've been stupid, so please learn from my errors. The closer you park yourself to anywhere you know she has been, the more likely you'll be outed. Walk into the bar where you met her (even if she doesn't work there any more) (just like your idiot uncle Tom Tit did once or twice), and her mates will be summoning her by cellphone within seconds of your arrival. Rookie error. Game over. No chance.

As for your specific 'chances of her turning up at the airport' query: that's never happened to me (though I had phone calls while waiting at the luggage carousel, as I say) but you always see dozens of bargirls (giveaway tats and tight jeans) waiting on the airport benches (wenches on benches!) before you head out to the taxi rank, clearly waiting for incoming punters. Sure, most of them'll be regulars on a promise. But I've seen hapless dudes being aggressively pounced on there by sudden gals they'd clearly rather weren't there, these guys' faces a heartrending mixture of horror and resignation as they realize they're rumbled, while the gal grins like a Cheshire Cat, knowing she's in the money again for at least the foreseeable future.

Good luck. Let us know what you decide to do and how you get on. Genuinely interested. Have fun.