Do you have explicit chat with your partner during sex?

[hilululu]

For mutual pleasure during sex, it is important for both partners to have uninhibited conversations about how they pleasure each other. My wife and I (married for over 20 years) enter her in the missionary position during a sex session and keep inside for about 45 minutes before climaxing. During this time, we talk about many things, including sex matters. Finally, we climax almost at the same time.
What do other couples do?

Open communication during intimacy is a hallmark of a strong, enduring relationship, and it’s wonderful that you and your wife have found a way to connect both physically and emotionally. Talking openly about your desires, sensations, and even unrelated topics during intimacy can create a deeper sense of connection and trust, making the experience more enjoyable for both partners. This mutual understanding likely contributes to your ability to synchronize climaxes, which is something many couples strive for but don’t always achieve.

For other couples, the approach to intimacy can vary widely. While some may focus entirely on physical sensations during sex, others might incorporate elements like playful banter, affirmations, or even deeper emotional conversations, as you’ve described. The key is finding a rhythm and dynamic that suits both partners and enhances their shared pleasure.

Synchronizing climaxes, like in your case, is not always the goal or outcome for every couple, and that’s perfectly normal. Some couples might use verbal or nonverbal cues to guide each other toward shared satisfaction, while others prefer taking turns focusing on one partner’s pleasure at a time. The diversity in how couples approach intimacy reflects the uniqueness of each relationship.

Ultimately, what matters most is fostering an environment where both partners feel free to express their needs, desires, and emotions without judgment. By continuing to prioritize open communication and exploration, you and your wife set a beautiful example of how to maintain a vibrant, fulfilling sex life even after decades of marriage. Sharing such practices with other couples might inspire them to deepen their own intimacy and connection.

[piciossa]

Honestly, I think having explicit conversations during sex is a game-changer. My partner and I discovered this only recently, and it’s been amazing for our connection. It started with us just talking about what we liked or wanted to try, but now, during intimacy, we openly tell each other what feels good, what we want next, and even share fantasies. It’s like a constant feedback loop that enhances the experience for both of us.

What surprised me the most was how natural it felt after the first few times. Initially, I was nervous about sounding awkward or being judged, but my partner’s enthusiasm and responsiveness reassured me. It’s not just dirty talk; it’s real-time communication that deepens our trust and makes the whole experience more intimate.

The best part is that it helps avoid guesswork. Sometimes, people expect their partners to just know what they want, but that’s not always realistic. By vocalizing our feelings and desires, we’ve eliminated misunderstandings and awkward moments. It’s a huge relief to know we’re both on the same page.

I’d encourage anyone who’s hesitant to try it. Start small—maybe with a compliment or a question like, “Does this feel good?” Once you get comfortable, it becomes a natural and even exciting part of your intimacy.

[amravat123]

I’ve never really been the type to talk during sex, but after reading this, I’m wondering if I should give it a shot. My partner and I have a great relationship, but we’re more on the quiet side during intimacy. Most of our communication happens before or after, which works for us, but now I’m curious about adding verbal interaction in the moment.

One thing that’s held me back is feeling self-conscious. I worry about saying the wrong thing or breaking the mood. Plus, I’ve always thought of sex as a more physical than verbal act. But hearing how others have used explicit chats to strengthen their connection makes me think it might be worth stepping out of my comfort zone.

That said, I do think it depends on the relationship dynamic. Some people naturally feel more comfortable expressing themselves verbally, while others might prefer nonverbal cues. For example, I’m great at reading my partner’s body language, and I think that’s been enough so far. But who knows? Adding words might take things to the next level.

I’d love to hear from others who’ve transitioned from quiet intimacy to explicit chat. How did you ease into it without feeling awkward?

[antonio123]

This is such an interesting topic! My partner and I are huge fans of talking during sex—it’s a big part of our connection. It’s not always “explicit” in the sense of being dirty talk, though we do that too sometimes. A lot of the time, it’s just affirmations like, “You feel amazing,” or checking in with each other, like, “Is this good?” or “Do you want more of that?”

What I’ve noticed is that talking helps us stay present with each other. It’s easy to get caught up in your own head, especially if you’re worried about how you look or if you’re doing everything “right.” Talking brings us back into the moment and reminds us that we’re in this together.

One of my favorite things is when my partner tells me exactly what they’re feeling in real-time. It’s such a turn-on to know they’re enjoying themselves and to hear it in their voice. Plus, it builds confidence on both sides—you know you’re doing something right, and they feel comfortable enough to express it.

For anyone who hasn’t tried this yet, I’d say start with something simple. Even just saying, “You’re so sexy,” can open the door to more communication. Once you realize how much it enhances the experience, you’ll wonder why you didn’t start sooner!

[hanar123]

I’m in a long-term relationship, and we’ve recently started experimenting with explicit communication during sex. At first, it felt a bit awkward—like, what do you even say? But once we got over the initial weirdness, it became one of the best things we’ve done for our intimacy.

What’s funny is that we don’t just talk about sex during sex. Sometimes we’ll start joking or even bring up random topics while still being physically connected. It might sound odd, but it actually makes the experience more relaxed and fun. We’ve had some of our deepest conversations this way, and it’s brought us closer emotionally as well as physically.

One thing that’s been really transformative is using this time to express gratitude. For example, saying things like, “I love how you touch me,” or, “You make me feel amazing,” creates a positive feedback loop. It’s not just about pleasure; it’s about making your partner feel appreciated and loved.

I think the key to making this work is being authentic. Don’t try to force it or say things that don’t feel natural. If you’re genuine, your partner will pick up on that and respond in kind. It’s all about building trust and intimacy together.

[deigo123]

My wife and I have been married for 15 years, and I can say without hesitation that talking during sex has kept things exciting for us. It’s not always explicit; sometimes it’s just checking in with each other or sharing how we’re feeling in the moment. But other times, we let loose and say things we’d never say outside the bedroom, which adds a layer of thrill and playfulness.

For us, this didn’t come naturally. We had to work on being vulnerable and overcoming the fear of judgment. I remember the first time I tried saying something explicit—I was so nervous! But her reaction was so positive that it encouraged me to keep going. Now, it feels like second nature, and it’s made us more confident and connected.

One thing I’ve learned is that tone matters as much as the words. If you’re nervous, your partner might pick up on that and feel uncomfortable too. But if you’re relaxed and playful, it sets the tone for them to feel the same way. It’s a bit of an art, but it’s worth mastering.

For anyone hesitant about trying this, my advice is to start slow. Maybe begin with compliments or simple observations, like, “I love how soft your skin feels.” Once you build up that comfort level, you can explore more explicit or adventurous territory. It’s all about growing together.