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+--- Thread: i'm preparing for the ultimate (/showthread.php?tid=3593)
i'm preparing for the ultimate - johnson13 - 01-28-2025
So, there’s this girl I know, and I’m really interested in her. Like, seriously interested—this isn’t just a fling for me. I see her as someone I’d love to have a long-term relationship with. But there’s a bit of a catch. She’s made it clear that before we can even think about dating, she wants us to hook up first. Essentially, she said I need to prove myself in bed before we take things further.
Now, I’m fairly confident in my skills, but here’s the thing—she’s very experienced. It’s clear she knows what she likes, and I’m sure her standards are high. I don’t just want to do okay; I want to impress her. I want to make sure she feels like I’m not only meeting her expectations but exceeding them. The pressure is definitely on, and I’m taking this seriously because I want to show her I’m worth her time and energy.
I get that everyone’s preferences are different, but I’m looking for any advice I can get to really step up my game. Are there certain things I should say or do? Are there specific moves or techniques that are considered universally good? I’m particularly interested in understanding more about oral—how to do it in a way that truly satisfies her. I know that for a lot of women, it’s a crucial part of intimacy, and I don’t want to fall short there.
Then there are positions. I know variety is important, and I’m ready to try whatever will make her feel good. But what positions are best for maximizing pleasure for her? Are there certain movements or rhythms I should focus on? I’m willing to adapt and learn, but I want to go into this as prepared as possible.
More than just the physical, I also want to make sure I’m saying the right things. I know communication is key in moments like these—asking what she likes, responding to her needs, and making her feel desired. But I also don’t want to overthink it to the point where I come across as robotic or unnatural. I want the experience to feel genuine and passionate while also showing her that I’m attentive to her desires.
At the end of the day, I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make this a positive experience for her. I care about her, and I want her to see that I’m not just putting in effort because she asked me to—I’m doing it because I want her to feel special, valued, and genuinely satisfied. If anyone has advice on how to approach this, from techniques to mindset, I’d really appreciate it. I’m ready to put in the work to make this something unforgettable for her.
RE: i'm preparing for the ultimate - amravat123 - 01-28-2025
Hey man, first of all, I gotta give you credit for taking this seriously. It’s easy to just rush through these things and hope for the best, but it sounds like you're putting in the work to really understand her and what she wants, which is key. When it comes to oral, I think the most important thing is to pay attention to her reactions. Every woman is different, so what works for one might not work for another. However, a good rule of thumb is to be patient, slow, and experiment with pressure and rhythm. Use your hands in combination with your mouth to keep things varied, and don’t be afraid to ask her directly what feels best. Communication is everything—before, during, and after.
As for positions, definitely focus on the ones that give her control. Women often enjoy positions where they can guide things at their pace, like cowgirl or reverse cowgirl. These allow her to control the rhythm and angle, which is huge for a lot of women. But at the same time, don't be afraid to try different angles yourself. Doggie style, for example, can be great if you focus on the depth and pace, and it hits different spots depending on how you angle yourself. Variety is key, and staying in tune with her body will tell you a lot about what she likes.
Mindset-wise, it’s important to stay confident but also not put too much pressure on yourself. You want her to feel like she’s with someone who is enjoying the moment and isn’t just trying to "pass the test." Don’t overthink it; be natural and let your body language show her that you're into her. Compliment her, talk to her during the act, and don’t be afraid to make it fun. If she sees that you're genuinely enjoying the experience and not just trying to impress her, it’s going to go a long way.
Lastly, when it comes to communicating during the act, don’t be shy to ask her what she likes. A lot of guys get nervous asking, but trust me, women appreciate the effort. Asking things like, “How’s this? Do you want me to slow down?” shows her that you're invested in her pleasure, and that’s exactly what she wants. Just stay relaxed, be authentic, and most importantly, make sure you’re both having a good time.
RE: i'm preparing for the ultimate - deigo123 - 01-28-2025
Sounds like you're really putting the pressure on yourself, but honestly, that’s a great attitude if you want to make this a memorable experience. I agree with the previous poster about paying attention to her reactions. When it comes to oral, think of it as a mix of technique and connection. Some women like a soft, slow approach, while others prefer more intensity. Try varying your movements and pay close attention to how she responds. One thing I always recommend is using your tongue in circles or gently flicking it—this can often feel great, especially if you vary it with deep breaths or light kisses around her thighs.
As for positions, you’re right to focus on variety, but you might want to try positions where she’s more in control at first—like missionary with her legs over your shoulders or cowgirl. These allow her to adjust her pleasure and really focus on her experience, which is what you're aiming for. A good idea is to switch things up if you sense she might want more. Keep it spontaneous, and don’t be afraid to take a break to change it up if things feel stagnant. It’s all about keeping things fresh and exciting.
Your approach of wanting to make sure she feels valued is spot on. Trust me, if you're genuinely invested in her satisfaction, she’ll notice, and that will go way further than any specific technique. Don’t get too hung up on the pressure of being perfect in bed. Women are looking for the emotional connection and the effort you're willing to put into pleasing them. Be confident, be real, and show her that you're not just doing this because she asked—you’re doing it because you care.
When it comes to communicating during intimacy, I think less is often more. Don’t overdo the sweet talk or make it sound forced. Ask her questions, sure, but focus on her body language. If she’s making noise, moving in a certain way, or reacting positively, don’t hesitate to encourage that. A simple “Does this feel good?” or “I love it when you do that” can go a long way. It shows you’re in tune with her and her needs. And remember, it’s not just about what you’re doing—sometimes, it’s about creating a fun and relaxed atmosphere that helps her enjoy the moment more.
RE: i'm preparing for the ultimate - piciossa - 01-28-2025
I can totally relate to the pressure you're feeling, but I think the key here is to stay relaxed and be yourself. You’re already thinking about all the right things—techniques, positions, communication. The fact that you care about her pleasure shows you’re on the right path. When it comes to oral, I’ve found that a big part of the success is in the build-up. Start slow and tease a bit, kiss around her inner thighs, and build the anticipation. When you finally go for it, make sure you’re comfortable and can keep at it without losing energy. Experiment with different techniques, like varying the speed or intensity to find what works best for her.
Positions wise, a good one to try is the spooning position. It's great for intimacy because you’re close to each other, and you can focus on the slow rhythm. It also gives you a chance to touch her and show affection between moves. The key here is to focus on the small details—gentle caresses, kissing, and maintaining that emotional connection. Women often enjoy these little moments even more than the bigger movements.
It’s awesome that you’re thinking about the emotional aspect, too. This isn’t just about the physical act—it’s about the experience. Make sure you’re paying attention to her responses, but also keep it fun. If you notice that she’s not as responsive to something, don’t be afraid to ask her what she enjoys. The moment you start having fun and stop overthinking every move, she’ll notice it. That authentic energy can make all the difference.
Don’t forget that confidence comes from how comfortable you are in the moment. Even if things don’t go perfectly, if you’re present and enjoying the experience, that’s what will make her feel valued. Women love a guy who isn’t afraid to laugh things off or admit when something isn’t working, so don’t put too much pressure on yourself to be flawless. Keep the communication natural, and the rest will follow.
RE: i'm preparing for the ultimate - hanar123 - 01-28-2025
I totally get where you're coming from, man, but I think you're putting a lot of weight on what you're supposed to "prove." Honestly, a woman will always appreciate a guy who’s confident in his abilities but also understands the importance of emotional connection. As far as oral goes, I'd say the biggest piece of advice is to take your time. Don’t rush through it. Use your hands, mix it up between light strokes and pressure, and change it up depending on her feedback. It can be more about the build-up than the actual moment, so remember that subtlety is key.
In terms of positions, I like the idea of mixing things up, but I think one of the best positions to try is missionary with some variation. Having her legs over your shoulders can give you a deeper angle and allows you to kiss her while you're doing your thing, which can really enhance intimacy. If you feel like things are slowing down, switch things up by shifting to something more adventurous like doggie style, where you can focus on rhythm and depth.
I know you’re feeling the pressure, but it’s really about creating a dynamic where you’re both enjoying each other. Ask her what she likes and encourage her to talk about what feels good. This lets her know you're not just trying to “perform”—you’re there to experience it with her. Don’t be afraid to ask for feedback, and let her take control when she wants to.
One thing that always helps is keeping the conversation alive in bed. Small comments like “You feel amazing” or “I love it when you do that” can not only make her feel good physically but also emotionally. Women appreciate the small things—whether it’s a kiss on the forehead or simply making her feel like the most important person in the room. When you stop worrying about the “perfect” moment and just focus on her pleasure, things will go a lot smoother.
RE: i'm preparing for the ultimate - antonio123 - 01-28-2025
I see where you're coming from, and I can tell you're really invested in making this a positive experience. First of all, don’t stress too much about “performing.” Women appreciate authenticity more than anything, and if you’re genuine, she’ll pick up on it. As for oral, the best tip I can give you is to take it slow. Pay attention to how she reacts to different sensations, and try to change it up every now and then. Using your fingers in combination with your mouth can add some nice variety, but the key is always to focus on her pleasure, not just rushing to the finish line.
When it comes to positions, don’t be afraid to explore. If she wants to take control, let her, but also try some positions where you can vary the angle. I’d recommend trying missionary with a slight twist—like having her legs on your shoulders to give a deeper angle, which might heighten her pleasure. Changing up the rhythm, the depth, and the angle as you go can help you both find what feels best.
One of the biggest things I’ve learned in these situations is that communication isn’t just about talking—it’s about reading her body language and making sure you’re in sync with each other.